


Wishing You Well

by NatureTree



Series: No restrictions [4]
Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Don't want to spoil anything, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Just know it's angsty, Keith (Voltron) Angst, Keith (Voltron) is a Mess, M/M, Proceed carefully or don't read at all if any of these contents are triggering for you, Suicide Attempt, This was supposed to be light-hearted..., kangst
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-03
Updated: 2018-08-07
Packaged: 2019-06-18 04:47:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,230
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15478002
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NatureTree/pseuds/NatureTree
Summary: "I wish Keith would tell the truth."OR;There's a magic wishing well on a planet they're visiting for the first time and the Paladins makes a wish.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I dunno what happened.  
> Trigger Warning: There is going to be self-harm, and suicidal thoughts, AND suicide attempt. Please, don't continue reading if it is triggering for you.
> 
> If I forgot to add anything to the trigger warning, please tell me!

> **"I wish Keith would tell us the truth."**

* * *

This wasn't what Lance had in mind when he woke up, did his morning beauty routine and walked to the kitchen. But in hindsight, they should have thought about how the wishing well might take it literal, or that the wishing well could even be true. Because when Lance went into the kitchen he almost had a heart attack. Not because Pidge was currrently wearing a dress and chatting with Allura about what sounded like hair-do's, or that Shiro was eating the food-go like it was amazing with a spork in hand, or that Hunk was bowling with mugs and a ball or how Allura was somehow still beautiful with short hair and more masculine features. Though what did give him a heart attack was seeing Coran cooking food.

And Hunk letting him do it.

In that moment Lance knew it was a bad idea, that wishing well. Nothing was weird with Lance though, except that he did feel a bit sick. Though, it could always just be space-flu.

"Guys, what is wrong with you?" He said over the chaos and everyone turned their attention to him, stopping with whatever they were doing. Hunk with the ball mid-air. Lance would never get used to seeing Hunk be so reckless with kitchen necessities.

"I don't know, like, I just really wanted to wear a dress today. But I would bet it's the well." Pidge uttered from were she was sat beside Allura.

"Right..." Shiro muttered and frowned at the food-go. "I suppose that's why this tastes like heaven."

Hunk finally turned from his bowling 'arena' and looked at Shiro like he had grown two heads. If there was something known in the group it was that all of them hated the food-go, Hunk especially. Maybe that's why it looked like Hunk was ready to use Shiro as the bowling ball.

Allura's sigh could be heard from were she sat as the stood up, abandoning her conversation with Pidge. That was when Lance realised why she looked more masculine, it was because she was a boy. Should he call her by other pronouns now?

"It's the well. I should have known nothing good could have come from it." Lance saw her run a hand through her short hair - almost as short as his own - that was a curly mess. She was also wearing her dress but instead of being a dress, it was a suit. "What did you all wish, it's important so that we know what to expect."

Pidge was the first to speak up, raising her hand meanwhile.

"I wished for you to understand what it's like to be forced to be a boy." She said and looked at Allura with a sheepish smile of her own.

Next was Hunk.

"I wished for me to be less anxious." He muttered and looked a bit ashamed.

He could still remember their talk they had at the Garrison. How Hunk felt bad for being so anxious, how he felt like a nuisance because he knew it would never come in handy. Hunk was clearly self-conscious about that fact and Lance made a mental note of how he had to have a talk with him after this was over.

"I wished for Shiro to appreciate my cooking." Coran piped up from the stove-like thing were he was currently cooking something that looked oddly delicious.

"I wished for Coran to make better food." Shiro said from his seat, and he didn't seem to regret it at all. Maybe Shiro's wish was actually helpful in all situations since it could actually be edible for once.

"I, myself, wished for Pidge to talk to me more but I never thought..." Allura paused. "She would dress like me."

Now, everyone was looking at Lance and he new it was his moment to shine. He could tell everyone what he wished most of all. He could reveal his intentions and let them figure this out to stop it. While Lance loved to help and loved the idea to contribute to helping, he couldn't do it. Not when the were looking at him so expectantly. Yet, his want to help oerweight any other option.

"I wished for Keith to tell the truth."

* * *

There's were the problem really began, they realised. They hadn't seen Keith all day and even if it was morning, Keith used to take something to eat before going to the training room. Which meant that whatever happened, was because of Lance's wish. Which in turn meant that Keith shouldn't be having any trouble, unless he kept spouting off facts anytime he saw someone. That would be annoying.

Therefore, when they found Keith in the longue just sitting there and staring at seemingly nothing it was immensely creepy.

"Dude, buddy, wake up..." Hunk said from Lance's left side as they were leaning over Keith who hadn't moved an inch since they came in. It wouldn't be too bad if it wasn't for the fact that Keith hadn't said anything to Lance's taunts. Maybe Keith had wished to be deaf for the rest of his life?

So, Pidge had gotten Shiro, Allura and Coran to the longue too and now they were all sitting opposite of Keith ho had still not moved. Lance thought it was straight out of a horror movie and that any time - when they are lowering their guard - he could attack them. Which made Lance think that maybe he should stop watching horror movies.

"Okay, maybe we have to ask him questions. We do after all not now how this works." Pidge said were she sat squished between Hunk and Shiro. "You wished he would tell the truth which might mean he can only tell the truth and nothing else."

"Well, then I'll start." Hunk said from Lance's left. Usually Hunk would have been one of the last to try since this was something they knew nothing about, but he had wished for himself to be less anxious afterall. "Do you like my food?"

The answer from Keith was almost instantaneous as he moved slightly to look at them, it didn't even seem like he had been sitting still for so long. He moved normally like someone would do during a conversation.

"Yes."

"My turn! I'm a girl?" Pidge said, clearly trying to test if he still had the same memories.

"Yes, you identify as female." Keith said as he cocked his head to the side, looking at Pidge with a soft expression.

"What do you mean I identify as a female?" She asked, looking at him with a confused facial expression.

This time Keith closed his eyes as if searching for memories and/or answers. He looked back up, opening his eyes and still had that soft expression. He seemed at peace, nothing like Lance has ever seen him like before.

"You were born with male genitals. But you transitioned to female at a young age." He said, not robotically but more soft than anything either of them have heard.

Pidge looked a bit stunned from where she was sat.

"H-how do you know?"

"I were at a mission with the blades and worked together with your brother Matt and he accidently let it slip." He answered.

Pidge didn't say anything else and kept quiet and Lance briefly wonderedd if she was okay. It was a big thing for a friend to know you are trans without telling them, it's a big thing either way. Lance isn't too surprised but even if he was he didn't want to cause a scene.

"Oh, my turn!" Allura said. "Keith, do I look good as a male?" She asked, her voice serious.

Keith took awhile to answer, his eyes sweeping over Allura's more masculine figure. Lance could almost feel the eyes on himself, it was weird because Allura was on the other side of the couch. He watched intently. Keith's eyes sweeping over her face first, her sharper jawline and thicker eyebrows, thinner face and eyes and her thicker neck. Her broader shoulders and her biceps that were very noticeable through the tight sleeves. Her flat chest and thin waist and hips, her muscular thighs that could crush a melon and her calves, down to her feet. Lance was sure that Keith's cheeks were tinted red now, and not because of the light.

"Yes, you do look good." He said flatly, but his cheeks said otherwise. Still getting redder.

He looked at Allura, seeing her cheeks tint red and he was fuming. How could Keith even compliment her, it wasn't fair. Why would she blush when Keith did it but not him? Was it because he flirted with every good-looking girl he saw?

Why did she care what Keith thought in the first place?

"Thank you, Keith, I'm happy you find me acceptable?" Allura said and it did sound more like a question than anything.

Lance steeled himself for Keith's answer, knowing he was going to try to charm her pants off.

"You're more than acceptable. You're very attractive." Keith said with a tiny smile on his face.

Lance felt his eyes bug out of their holes as he stared at the guy sitting in front of them. That's not Keith, he thought. Keith would never compliment someone like that, even when under a spell that forces him to say the truth. Not when he actually think she's very attractive.

He could hear Pidge's small "ohh's" and Hunk's small "ahh's" and felt his blood boiling, it didn't help when both Keith's and Allura's faces were red. Did they have some kind of secret affair going on? Some mutual attraction? Was that why she always ignored his attempts at flirting? Because she has fallen for Keith.

"My turn!" He yelled, almost enough that his lungs burned. Everyone's attention was brought to him.

"Oh, are you jealous that Keith's honest thought are getting to the Princess?" Coran said from his seat beside Lance, having seen every reaction he had to Keith's thoughts. However, Lance ignored Coran for the moment to ask a very important question.

With a deep breath he said it.

"Are you romantically interesed in anyone in this room?"

This time Keith seemed to think it over, almost as if he were fighting it. He really didn't want to say anything and it was clear that Keith was uncomfortable, which almost made Lance feel guilty.

"Yes."

Lance felt the air get thicker with tension as he glanced at the other people in the room. They all seemed to be thinking the same thing. Yet no one wanted or could bring themselves to say anything.

Lance did something very stupid.

"Who?"

"Lance! That's too much. Too personal. Whoever Keith likes, it's his choice when to confess." Shiro said, his voice stern and disapproving. Lance agreed with Shiro, but he acted on impulse. He really wanted to know who could make Keith get all flustered and unable to form coherent thoughts.

The room went dead silent and he began to wonder if Keith had already said who it was but he missed. That couldn't be possible since he were concentrating harder than ever. He knew all of them were.

Maybe Shiro was concentrating the most. Lance knew how close they were and he wouldn't be surprised if Shiro were the most curious about his love-life. Keith and Shiro had a deep bond, one Lance could only wish to have with any of his team mates. They knew each other before Voltron, before the Kerebros mission. They were like family before it all.

"L-... Lance." Keith's voice piped up weakly.

Wait.

What.

"Uh..." Lance said intelligently.

Keith liked Lance. He liked Lance. Why did he like Lance? Wasn't Keith the most straight person in existence. Didn't he like girls? Whenever Lance flirted with alien chicks Keith would scowl. He would grumble and walk away.

Keith didn't do that because he thought Lance was annoying or obnoxious. He did that because he was jealous. Of the alien chicks. He wanted Lance to flirt with him. Whenever Keith was being playful, joking and smiling at Lance it was honest. Keith liked Lance. Romantically.

Lance blinked once, twice, three times and looked at Keith, his eyes bugging out of their holes again.

First now, he noticed how quiet the room was and slowly turned his head to look at the other occupants in the room.

"Well... That was unexpected." Hunk uttered as he was staring at Keith, and he could see how the gears was still turning in everybody's head.

But when his gaze landed on Shiro, he thought he saw death itself. Shiro looked ready to tear Lance apart and if he died on the inside no one had to know. Except that he was pretty sure Shiro would kill him and enjoy it too. Shiro was glaring at him, his mouth turned down in a frown and his arms crossed over his chest. Shiro didn't look surprised and Lance realised that Shiro may not have been concentrated but instead worried. Shiro knew about Keith's feelings and wanted to protect his friend. However Shiro's voice was worse.

He sounded so disappointed.

"Keith hadn't planned to confess and you made him do it against his will." Shiro said, drawing the attention towards him. "Look at him Lance."

He turned his gaze from Shiro and looked at Keith, and he didn't recognise him. Keith who always stood so proud and tall, never let anyone talk down to him. Who threatened a king because he turned against his own people, who was part Galra, who was hot-headed and impulsive and the strongest person Lance had ever met. The best pilot at the Garisson and the most aloof person in the room. Keith, the red paladin.

He had his face buried in his hands, his shoulder hunched up to his ears. He looked so small.

Keith had never looked so vulnerable before.

Keith was shaking.

"I-I'm-"

Lance couldn't form words. He couldn't think. Keith looked like this because of him, because he forced him to say something he didn't want to. Something he never planned to say. This is Lance's fault. This was all because of him. He was insensitive and hurt Keith all because he was jealous of him. Because he could make Allura blush. He hurt Keith because he was petty.

Keith liked him and Lance had done nothing to deserve it.

"K-Keith... I-I..." Lance tried to say but couldn't form a sentence.

 Keith stood up, not looking at any of them as he stormed out of the room, his heart not even in that.

It was quiet.

Until it wasn't.

Pidge was the first to say anything.

"This-what..." She said, like she couldn't understand what happened. Pidge had never been the best at emotions. She turned to Lance with a frown. "Fix this."

It fell on to deaf ears. Lance didn't hear it. He couldn't hear it. Because it was his fault. He hurt Keith before, he teased him and made fun of him but Keith always responded. Now, Keith looked weak. He was shaking, all because of Lance.

Then Shiro.

"This is your fault, Lance!" He began. "Keith never wanted to say anything. You-because of you he had to."

Then Hunk.

"You messed up, dude."

He really did. He was jealous and hurt the only one who loved him how he wanted to be loved.

Then Coran.

"I know you're surprised, my boy. But do something about it."

He was surprised.

Then Allura.

"Keith loves you, Lance. Whether you reciprocate it or not does not matter. Just fix this."

* * *

 

 

> **One, two three.**
> 
> **Stupid, stupid, stupid.**
> 
> **Four, five, six.**
> 
> **Why did you do it?**
> 
> **Seven, eight, nine.**
> 
> **How disgusting. Did you see how they looked at you?**
> 
> **Ten, eleven, twelve.**
> 
> **Shiro looked concerned. It's your fault he's not happy.**
> 
> **Thirteen.**
> 
> **Hunk looked so surprised. You're in love with his best friend. How disgusting of you.**
> 
> **Fourteen.**
> 
> **You hurt Pidge. Outing her without her permission.**
> 
> **Fifteen.**
> 
> **You told Allura she was attractive. She was so happy. Then, she looked at you like when the truth came out. She hates you like when you told them** **you were Galra.**
> 
> **Sixteen.**
> 
> **Coran looked so sympathetic, knowing that Lance would never feel the same for you.**
> 
> **Seventeen.**
> 
> **Lance looked so disgusted. Lance never wanted a fag to love him. He never wanted a Galra to fall for him. He never wanted to like his rival. He never wanted to even look at you. He hates you. He makes fun of you because you're disgusting.**
> 
> **Eighteen.**
> 
> **This is what you deserve.**
> 
> **Nineteen.**
> 
> **Remember when you told Shiro he was like a brother to you? How he walked away without another glance at you? He never wanted you.**
> 
> **Twenty.**
> 
> **Remember how Pidge looked so distraught when you told everyone about her sex. She has the right to hate you. It was supposed to be her moment.**
> 
> **Twenty-one.**
> 
> **Hunk is just too kind to be honest. He hates you because you're Galra. Remember how hung up he was on it when you were at that mission with the Weblum?**
> 
> **Twenty-two.**
> 
> **Allura hates you. You're Galra. You killed her people.**
> 
> **Twenty-three.**
> 
> **Coran doesn't like you. You're a burden to him.**
> 
> **Twenty-four.**
> 
> **Lance is laughing at you right now.**
> 
> **Twenty-five.**
> 
> **Deeper.**
> 
> **Twenty-six.**
> 
> **Deeper.**
> 
> **Twenty-seven.**
> 
> **Not deep enough, Keith.**
> 
> **Twenty-eight.**
> 
> **Do us all a favour, Keith. Deeper.**
> 
> **Twenty-nine.**
> 
> **_Deeper, you Galra._  
>  **
> 
> **Thirty.**
> 
> **That's better.**
> 
>  
> 
> **Look how beautiful it is Keith. Red has always been your favourite colour, hasn't it? Red is so beautiful. Especially when it's your blood, right Keith. Especially when it's all they have ever wanted to see. Allura wanted you to do this at the beginning. She wanted you to die. You killed her people, you killed her father. Coran only stopped her from doing anything because you're the red paladin. He wouldn't bother to get rid of you. Too much effort for a monster.**
> 
> **Shiro, he wished he could do it himself, right Keith? The only thing you haave ever given him is despair and pain. You always burdened him. He will be so happy now. You're making him happy right now, Keith.**
> 
> **Pidge wanted to throw you away and rot you like the unnecessary scrap you are. You were never needed, Keith. Don't you realise that?**
> 
> **Hunk just tried to stop himself from doing something to hurt his reputation. He wanted to leave you at the Weblum. He would have but you didn't stop burdening him.**
> 
> **Lance. What would he do to you when you finally confessed, Keith? Do you really think this was worse? You're only alive right now because he was too surprised.**
> 
> **Don't be sad, Keith.**
> 
> **You only ever wanted people happy.**
> 
> **This is your chance.**
> 
> **Deeper.**
> 
> **Deeper.**
> 
> **Cut deeper.**
> 
> **It's not going to hurt, Keith, my boy.**
> 
> **Good.**
> 
> **Soon you're going to be happy, my darling.**

* * *

Sometimes Lance wondered what love even was. Was love the feeling he had when his mother hugged him, or when his father would ruffle his hair? Was it when his sister would tease him about girls, or when his brother's make fun of him? Was it when he saw a beautiful girl? He wondered what it truly was. Because honestly, he was confused.

He didn't understand how eith could know it. Did Keith even know what love is?

Does he need to know what love is? Can't he just like somebody without having to wonder if it was love. Love shouldn't be so complex.

It was during this moment that he was walking towards his own room. He had time to think, he had been watching the stars and thinking. If he cried, that was for him to know. If he thought about his family, it was fine. It was fine to miss them, at least that was what Coran had said. He had said that it was understandable that he missed the people he had spent most of his life with.

It was understandable.

Coran than? Didn't he miss the people he spent most of his life with?

When Lance asked him he had said that he did, but he had to focus on the present and fight the Galra.

Lance really didn't know what he would do without Coran.

It was as he passed the kitchen that he heard a scream. The blood-icing kind. The one were someone was too shocked, too scared to move. The one were it was impossible to mistake what has happened. Someone has gotten hurt and he knew everyone thought the same when he saw Hunk run out of the kitchen, barely noticing his best friend.

That was Pidge.

Lance didn't think twice before running after his friend, not stopping even when his lungs were burning and his legs aching. The way to the hall of rooms had ever felt so long. Maybe it was because of Lance's spinning head or shaking shoulders, how he barely held himself together.

Something happened.

Someone hurt Pidge.

However, when he arrived, it wasn't Pidge that he saw first. She wasn't standing there, bleeding or shaking in fear or crying. She wasn't there at all. However, Keith's door was open and that only mean one thing. Pidge was in there and something happened there. Lance had a bad feeling about this. He didn't want to move from his spot. Hunk did however, and Lance thought bitterly about how Hunk's wish worked.

He didn't move at all, he couldn't move his legs. Not until he heard Hunk's despaired cry, gasp and whimper. Lance moved on instinct, crossing the hall in a few steps to storm into Keith's room and was at first surprised when he didn't see them at the door. No, they were standing by another door, assumedly the bathroom door. Hunk was covering his sight.

Lance walked slowly towards the door, Hunk turning around with his face pale. His eyes were red, bloodshot from the tears that were threatening to fall over.

"Don't... Get out Lance." Hunk said softly, not wanting his friend to see whatever was in there. Which drove Lance further forwards, pushing his friend away. When he saw it. Lance wished he had listened to Hunk, but he never did. He should have listened to Hunk. The image was now burned into his head for eternity. The image of his team mate lying on the floor with blood flooding from his wrists down onto the floor. Pidge cradling him against her, sobbing loudly and crying incoherent words.

Lance wished he had never walked into the room.

He barely registered Hunk dragging him into a hug, and Shiro coming in with Allura and Coran close behind.

What he did register was Shiro's cry of despair and how he was staring at Keith. He was on his knees the next second, eyes and mouth wide open in broken sobs and gasps.

He registered Shiro's words. Barely.

"You promised me that-you-you had stopped Keith."

His thoughts was a mess until he heard Coran's voice, not calm or reassuring as usual. It was stern and harsh.

"Move away, Pidge, Shiro." He saw Coran walking to Keith, shoving Pidge away softly and soon he was cradling Keith in his arms. "Stay strong, my boy." Coran whispered. Standing up straight and making his way out of the room. Lance couldn't focus on that. Not on Pidge's sobs and incoherent word. Not Shiro's mumbles and cries. Not Hunk's arms around him. Not Allura's terrified face or the tears she shed. Not his own still body or the tears he wern't able form.

Only the crimson colour of Keith's blood dripping to the floor.

* * *

Death was inevitable. Everyone would die one day.

Death was seen as something to fear, to despise with your whole being. Something evil and unforgivable, something everyone would go through. Something to hate and avoid. Something that some people saw as a salvation, a blessing, the end of something terrible.

Some of those people died young, some old. Some were suicidal, some were on their death bed. Some felt too much pain, physical or mental, to appreciate life's gifts. Gifts like happiness, grief, joy, boredom, adventures, friends. Sometimes love was seen as the biggest gift. Sometimes love was something you couldn't control. Something that appeared when you least wanted it to. Somewhere you never expected.

Sometimes, a person appreciated their own death like they did love. Sometimes they felt happy.

Sometimes all they could feel was despair.

Sometimes life was unfair to people. People who deserved so much except sadness. People who never wanted to see what death could bring. Feelings and fears that it could.

People died young. And it was unfair. Some chose they wanted to die, while some chose they didn't want to.

It was unfair.

Keith didn't deserve to die young.

* * *

> **"I wish I would succeed."**


	2. Can't Make You Love Me

 

 

> **Love has always been his weakness.**

* * *

 

Love is a confusing concept. What even is it? What does it mean?

There's so many different types of love. Platonic, romantic, sexual, puppy love, admiration. So many more than that. There's so many types of love. Many people get to experience all of them. Few people doesn't.

Love.

Sometimes love is something good, something that makes a person happy and makes them feel like they can do anything. Sometimes it's bad, something that makes a person cry. Feel hopeless and lonely. Love is complex. It's so complex that a person can go through their whole life wondering what it really is.

Love is not the only complex feeling. There's so many more. Like hate, it's just as strong of a word, maybe even stronger. Love and hate are so different but so alike. They are two sides of the same coin. Without one the other wouldn't exist. They're vital to each other. They're so different but they need each other.

Maybe that's where the phrase 'opposites attracts' comes from.

However, that's also where it ends. Because while opposites attract it's difficult to get along with someone the exact opposite. Exact opposites can't get along, it's not possible.

* * *

It was late. For the occupants at the castle, it was late. Too late, they were too late. None of them were on time when it mattered the most. No one could stop the inevitable and all of them blamed themself. Because they all felt love towards him.

Admiration, platonic.

It didn't matter, because it was love either way and losing somebody like that hurts. Losing someone so dear crushes everyone, it breaks them apart and leaves them to pick up the pieces themself. There were so many pieces, broken and shattered. There were cracks everywhere and the darkness were creeping closer to them all.

The darkness they once admired and wanted to fly in to. The darkness they looked up at and though 'it's so beautiful, I wonder when I will be there.' The darkness they had strived so long to get to. Something that had taken so much from them and given nothing back. But in the end it was their fault for letting themselves be lured in by something beautiful. Space had taken from them, but given nothing in return.

It had taken someone vital to them and now when he was gone they would never function the same again. Like a broken bone, it would heal and take it's time, however it would never look the same again. It would still be fragile whenever someone touched it.

Because after all, death doesn't just hurt, it breaks and takes and crushes souls and people alike.

* * *

 

It was a year ago and it still hurts. It hurts whenever someone mentions his name, but somehow they can relive the memories of him and laugh. They feel happiness again and while it hurts, it has healed. But the scar will stay, it's permanent.

Yet, Lance was happy that he could reunite with his family and tell all the stories of space and his team, his family. He could tell about when Shiro got stuck with his foot in a bucket, when Pidge had fallen asleep on her keyboard and woken up with the keys stuck to her face, when Hunk accidently gave their potential allies expired food and brought on a food war, when Allura had kissed a frog because she thought the human fairy tails were real, when Coran had slipped on the ice for at least ten minutes and then reminisced about when he had the slipperies.

When Lance realised his sexuality and flirted with the first 'boy', but was actually a telephone pole.

Or when they told everyone about their bravest and most courageous family member, who threw himself into dangerous situations, valued people highly and had no toleration for traitors. Who fought Zarkon and joined a space gang, loved animals and had a nice voice and ability to draw. Who was the storm before the calm, the hot-mullet-headed guy who has piloted not one, but two galactic lions in his life-time. Who was a great leader when it was crucial, listened to people when they came to him, cared so much about his family's happiness that he almost ended his own life.

Even if it made them anything but happy.

But ultimately, they were happy again. They were happy and they had everything they would ever need. They had each other. And while that might sometimes not be enough, while sometimes they still isolate themselves after a hard day, after a bad dream or memories they couldn't repress, they loved each other and that was all that would ever matter. Because while it hurt, they had people they could depend on. Because while it would heal, it would never be the same again.

But somehow, it's beautiful that way.

Life hurts, and it crushes and it breaks but still people continue to live; to fight. Everyone has different reasons for it. Maybe they aren't ready to leave, maybe they love too passionately, maybe they believe something good will happen at the end of the day. Maybe they are just too stubborn to give up on the game called life.

Because after all, life is a game. It's unfair and difficult. But if somehow, someone manages to win and reach the end, they will find what they need the most. Not what they want.

But that's okay, because Lance always wanted recognition, he wanted to be loved and envied by everyone, he wanted to be known and famous. And he is, but it didn't bring him happiness. Instead, his family - blood and otherwise - did.

Pidge, she wanted to find her family, wanted her brother and father back and she did. And while it made her happy to find them alive and mostly well, something was missing. Something she couldn't explain; until she found it right in front of her.

Hunk, he wanted to be safe and his friends and family to be happy, that was all he ever truly wanted. And when his family was hurting, while they were suffering, all he could do was cover in fear and he hated it. But eventually he found something that made him feel strong, and happy. He found courage but most importantly he found his family.

Shiro, all he ever wanted was to figure himself out. He wanted to know why he was like this. But he couldn't and so he ran; he ran and he ran and he ran. He got hurt, he was pushed back again and again and he wanted to give up, but right before he did he found the one thing he ever needed.

Allura, she wanted revenge, she wanted Zarkon to suffer and feel the pain she felt. She was ready to do anything to make him pay for what he did. But, while it was what she thought she wanted, she soon grew to love her team. She loved them so whole-heartedly that everytime they got hurt, it made her hate Zarkon more. But instead of wanting him to suffer, she just wanted her new-found family to be safe. And when they finally were, she was happy.

Coran, he wanted Altea back, he wanted his family and friends back, who all died in the war. He was ready to sacrifice hmself just to get them back. But then he met Lance; the goofball with a big heart, who got hurt so many times but refused to give up. Pidge; the genius with a heart and soul softer than anyone could imagine, who got her family taken, who just wanted them back. Hunk; the engineer and cook, always wearing his heart on his sleeve, who always hurt but hid it to make sure his friends - family - was safe. Shiro; the leader, the one everyone went to when they needed help, who had been in the midst of the empire, and seen things none of them could imagine but still had a heart of gold and a will of steel. Then, there was Allura; the princess who lost everything just like himself, who wanted to see the empire burn to dust, who - after everything - decided to put her trust in strangers she never had met, just for the sake of the universe.

Keith; the loner who knew nothing of teamwork, or of the familial love between a family and friends. Who only ever had one person in his life that he trusted, but got taken away from him. He was galra, but more than that - he was family. But somewhere inbetween the war and his team, lost himself.

All he ever wanted was for the world to burn for what it did to him. For the people it took from him. He didn't get what he needed the most, or what he thought he wanted until he was too broken to be repaired.

But at least, he got a second chance.

* * *

It was early in the morning, still dark outside but somehow it felt cosy. The snow falling slowly from the grey sky; knowing it's cold outside but only feeling the warmth of their home. It was something Pidge would never stop loving. It was something they had admired for a long time. Ever since coming back to Earth, they realised that while they loved space, this was their home. Not because it was Earth, but because on Earth they had their family. They had their mother, their father, their brother. They had Allura, and Coran and Lance, Hunk and Shiro. It was all that mattered for them, at least it used to be.

But now, they had something much bigger to look forward to.

"Coran, can you please tell us why you woke us up at the ass-crack of dawn?" Lance whined from his position on the couch, laying sprawled over the surface with his legs hanging off the armrest.

Pidge knew that if Shiro was awake enough, he would reprimand Lance for using a bad word. But currently, he was sitting slouched in the couch opposite from Lance, holding a hot cup of black and bitter coffee; his favourite cup which said "Space Dad #1".

"Well, I thought you guys might want to hear these exciting news, but if that's not the case then you're welcome to go back and nap in your tiny little sleep-chambers!" He said, holding his hands behind his back.

Everyone groaned but kept silent until Hunk voiced his thoughts.

"What is these "exiting news" Coran?" He said drowsily, almost mumbling as he sat in the couch, Lance leaning into his side.

Pidge grinned from where they stood beside their favourite ginger. They - unlike the other's - knew exactly what was going on due to being the one to pick up the phone. Therefore, they were the one to tell Coran of what was happening. So, they spoke up for the first time since they all had gathered in the living-room.

"These news we have to tell you," they began with a big and smug grin, "are actually very exciting. Yeah, calm down, calm down; I can see you jumping in uncontained excitement." They really weren't but - Pidge thought - they really should. "First of all, they/them pronouns today. Secondly, Mama McClain invited us for Christmas dinner later today." They paused to let the information sink into their sleep-filled brains.

Lance slowly progessed those words before looking at Pidge with a fae screaming in betrayal.

"Nonono, no, no.  _Why_ would mami tell  _you_ that instead of me; her son!" He almost yelled, utterly confused by the statement.

"Top ten anime betrayals."

Everyone turned their attention towards the figure sitting on the back-rest of the same couch as Shiro. Her voice was groggy and soft, her white long hair messy and looking almost like a birds-nest.

"Allura!?"

It really shouldn't surprise anyone anymore. Ever since coming back to Earth and hearing about these things called "memes" she loved them, unashamedly too. And the other things she was utterly in love with was animes, so it shouldn't come as a surprise to anyone in the room, but it did. Mostly because it was only six AM.

"Anyways," Pidge continued, bringing their attention back to them. "The last thing, and the real reason Coran woke you all up this early is because we got a call from the hospital just an hour ago." They paused and smiled sadly - but fondly.

"Keith is waking up."

 

**Author's Note:**

> ...
> 
> A second part?


End file.
